Profilectlx.Carlene Tan Li Xuan 11th July 1988. Currently 23+. Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School, SRJC (first 3 months), TPJC, NUS FASS (econs). loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.
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Sunday, August 22, 2004hi everyone! i'm finally back! i'm sure you al missed me right? hehe... kidding... i know i'm unmissed. *WAILS*... =)oh just to tell everyone, i don't have to retake chi anymore. somehow or other my mum just listened to me... for once. so now, i'm half cheered up.... anyway thanks peeps for always being there... love ya! *gives everyone a smooch... MUACKS!* by the way, its a wet kiss too... *chuckles* sorry, feeling hyper in the morning as usual. oh well think i gotta a million and one things to pen down here, but somehow its just too much... hm... i guess month just isn't my month. really. honestly i've never ever ever felt soo depressed in my whole entire live that i thought i was actually on the road to being "numb". stupid i know, how can a happy child like me become numb, right? but somehow i really nearly did. that day during erm... lit i think... erm ya, i was playing with the anti-drug abuse collar pin. somehow i just had the urge to play with the sharp part. dumb i know but ya, i was scratching it along my skin and i couldn't feel anything. nothing at all... so i continued. from the upper surface of my arm, down to the underside... i was happily scratching on one hand that i didn't realise i was scartching harder and harder everytime. when i looked at where i scratched i suddenly realise there were marks. as in real red marks. i was appalled by my own action. i was shocked becuase i'm always telling people not to hurt themselves but what was i doing? jeez, i felt really stupid(paiseh can't think of another word for stupid) =). yup so when i finally stopped, i examined my hands and they look awful. disgusting. disfigured. thank goodness its gone away now... well the moral of my story telling you this, is not to encourage anyone to do what i did or what everyone else is now doing, neither is it for you to show concern for me, but it is for you to show concern to the people around you. because i think compared to those people, i'm nothing. my problem is so minute it doesn't matter. i would just like to remind everone that no matter what happens, there WILL be a way out, only if you look for that way, right folks? hehe. yup yup. some people turn to God, which i think its cool. others turn to the people around you, which is also pretty cool. so for those who think that using pen knife is the only way, how bout trying the method of going to God. i'm very sure he's always there waiting for you to turn to him.. right folks? ;) alright, just had to crap. so ya, i'm done. tata! |